And the floodgates did open…

Monday morning… I’m getting ready downstairs, hear ‘B’s alarm clock going off, hear it turned off really quickly, hear footsteps to the bathroom, hear footsteps back from bathroom, hear footsteps on the stairs… mmmm, something not quite right. Usually takes at least half an hour to achieve all that. Door swings open and there we have a rather bedraggled ‘B’, looking something like Alice in Wonderland when she starts crying and flooding the place because she couldn’t stop, bless her.

She cried and cried and cried, I was soaked, had to change tops! Grabbed some Emergency Essence Flower Remedy which was gratefully received – not the usual resistance – and we waited for the storm to calm.

So what brought this on? In one word: ANXIETY. ‘B’ is what they call Sensory Defensive. Her nervous system is basically in a state more commonly known as the Fright or Flight State ALL the time. Can you even imagine what that must feel like?

Since the clocks changed ‘B’ had sprung back into action, happens every year, this last Winter for some reason being especially bad. She’s been doing so well though, a bit too well. Since April she had decided to stay for packed lunch, normally she comes home every day (except swimming day ’cos otherwise we’d be coming back before we’d got home!).

We found coming home for lunch gave her some time to regroup before the afternoon, this has worked really well for her so far. Downside is me having to traipse backwards and forwards to school all day (good job I’m self-employed huh?) but that’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make. It makes sense, a happy ‘B’ equates to a happy Mum!

Back to the story: something had to give. The last few days she hadn’t been quite so ‘bounce out of bed’ more like ‘roll out of bed once I’ve been given a little push’ type of thing. I think the extra stress of being at school all day every day finally took it’s toll on her. Whether she wanted to or not, her body needed to let it all out.

And let it all out she most certainly did. Afterwards she commented that she didn’t understand why she had been crying but that she felt alot better. A day off school was all that was needed to put her back on course. Why a day off? If you had seen her, you wouldn’t be asking this question. She was exhausted, remember it wasn’t just tears that she shed, it was all the anxiety too.

OK, so it’s now Friday and we’ve found the culprit. This is quite usual for us but I think it’s important to find the cause of the anxiety, you can avoid a repeat scenario if you know what sets her off, you know? 2 things: Sports Day, in ‘B’s world, this is on a par with school plays, it’s a performance in front of spectators and that freaks her out! She’s not able to participate and just enjoy the experience, whether a successful outcome or not she should still enjoy it. It’s the combination of the competitiveness, the pressure of coping with people watching, too many people in one place, schoolmates telling her she’s going to make them lose ’cos she’s not a natural-born athlete, that kind of thing.

The 2nd: anxiety about whose class she’s going to be in next school year. They usually leave it until a day or 2 before the end of year, not enough time in SID World to prepare and assimilate. We do plenty of work during the holiday to get her used to the idea but I’m not sure the school truly understands what living with SID is like. Because she appears so ‘normal’ (I hate that word) I think they forget, or maybe don’t even fully accept, that preparation is key to EVERYTHING we do.

Solution: I don’t put my daughter through any more stress than is ABSOLUTELY necessary. I’m the one that has to cope, B’s the one that pays the price. Is it really worth letting her get sooo stressed? You may not agree with me, but I don’t think it is. So, morning off school and a letter explaining the whole situation to her teacher.

Communication is so important, if I am to help the school understand I need to be open and honest with them… Communication with your child is equally important, if they can understand how their body works and why it happened, they can learn to help themselves. In turn it helps them feel that they have some control over the SID, not the other way around, and empowerment is a wonderful tool.

Till next time
Blessings
‘B’s Mum