Wednesday 18 May 2011

Ear we go again…

About 4 years ago ‘B’ wanted to have her ears pierced. We explained to the lady who pierced them that she was on the Spectrum and could she please smell the antiseptic wipes, show her the piercing equipment to be used etc. etc., which she was more than happy to do. It was all part of the process as those of you who have kids on the Spectrum only know too well. ‘B’ was very brave throughout the whole thing, even though she so wanted to do it, it was still terrifying for her. In fact she cried throughout the whole process, the piercer telling her she could have a special deal that day, half price, I am sure because she felt so sorry for her!

Anyway, the 6 weeks healing went by and we realised the basic flaw in our plan… having them pierced was one thing, getting the trainer earrings out, was entirely another situation, one we most certainly hadn’t anticipated!

Try as I might, and even though she understood the logic and implications of the whole thing, (which I think made it even worse for her because she got frustrated at her own illogical responses) we couldn’t get them out. About a year later they started to get infected and unfortunately I had to almost pin her to the ground, screaming her lungs out and yank them out. To her dismay they closed up almost immediately.

OK, so a couple of years went by, she told me she wanted to give it another try. We talked and talked and talked, her case being made stronger by the fact that she knew what to expect this time so it would be easier and she was 2 years older. To be fair, I could see her point…

Also, it was one of those things she was so determined to do, I think in hindsight she wanted to prove to herself she could be ‘normal’, do the same as her friends and it would all work out ok. So call me a fool, I eventually gave in.

She didn’t cry, in fact, she wanted to take them out after 2 weeks (but they hadn’t fully healed). I guess I should have let her…

Yesterday morning (almost a year and a half after the event), I was getting ready for work, she came downstairs very flustered and obviously upset. I only have two 2-hour classes a week and she had to go pick one of them to lose control! Turned out the earring had slipped into her ear… we had no choice, it had to come out, if I had left it and the weeping dried up it would have started to heal over and we would never get it out. She was so scared, stressed and hysterical that I couldn’t have taken her to her friends as normal when I work, I would have ended up having to go get her.

I’m surprised nobody called the police, the amount of screaming coming from our house… but eventually it came out. The other took the rest of the day to think about and an hour and a half of ‘practising’ late last night, thankfully that one eventually just popped off.

Have we learnt our lesson? We have agreed neither of us wants to go through that again… so fingers crossed we have.

Tonight is being spent trying to get a fresh pair in! Wish us luck…

Till next time
‘B’s Mum

Addendum: Took us several hours of ‘practising’ to get some new ones in but she wasn’t having it. The holes are closing up way too fast, she heals ridiculously quickly, so time is of the essence. It looks like we aren’t going to get any new ones in… boy, is she cross with herself!!!!!! She kept muttering ‘stupid ears, stupid holes, stupid SID!’ or words to that effect LOL!

OK, so just as I finished this addendum… ‘B’ walks in and says “Mum, I need to get new earrings in…”. So, we go off to my room, sit down and she just does it… SIMPLE OR WHAT? She’s now feeling rather silly for making such a fuss…



Sunday 8 May 2011

Benjamin’s School

I just had to Blog about this project!

http://www.benjaminfoundation.co.uk/service/benjmins-school

I never thought we would ever consider ‘B’ going back to school! Well, maybe that statement is not strictly true. I most certainly couldn’t envisage ‘B’ ever returning to conventional school. But we have just heard of a new type of school, a school that sounds like the stuff dreams are made of…

They call it an ‘out of the box’ approach (the ‘box’ being a classroom) and I have to say, from what we’ve read so far, ‘B’ seems keen enough to warrant a deeper look! And to be honest, I too am keen to get involved. This sort of project is just my kind of thing!

One thing ‘B’ has said to me recently is that although she has her best friend (also home-educated), it would be nice to have some more friends. Only thing is, ‘B’ tends to prefer older children, always has. Her best friend has said the same.

It seems to me that there are two basic types of home-educated families. Those that are happy to get together with other families and share resources etc. and those that really prefer to do their own thing and be left alone to do it. There is nothing wrong with either of these approaches… but it does make finding other families to connect with hard. In the 18 months or so we’ve been at home we’ve only really come across half a dozen families, if that, in our immediate area. There are definitely more families out there, but it looks like they are the ones that prefer anonymity.

So attending somewhere like Benjamin’s School could help on that level too!

The project is still in it’s infancy at the moment but we will watch closely to see how it unfolds. An project like this has so much potential!

Till next time
‘B’s Mum